Welcome to the fabulous and sometimes insane life
of a working mother who is trying hard not to
let her whole existence be determined by her
cute little munchkins, yet continues to be drawn
in by the adorable and sometimes annoying tiny people!

Monday, April 1, 2013

The Adventure of a Lifetime....NOT

After an amazing Easter service with friends and family including the privilege of watching my oldest daughter get baptized, we head home for a delicious lunch and to finish packing for our trip to the beach. We were only getting a couple of days because I am having my wisdom teeth out on Wednesday (a completely different blog post, I am sure). So after pictures in the rain, a delicious meal, no egg hunt (due to the rain) and the loading of the cars with 3 adults, 5 kids, and 2 dogs, we were off to the beach and unknowingly The Adventure of a Lifetime....NOT! 
We begin our trip heading south into storms, but what did we care we were on the way to the beach. Even being at the beach in the rain is better than not being at the beach. I mean, everything is better at the beach....well almost everything. We hop on I-10 at Quincy Exit 174 and headed west. Before we got to the next exit at 166, we were in a traffic jam. Luckily it continued to move, be it at a snail's pace, and after about 6 miles and 30 minutes later we were out and moving. However, about 60 miles later we have to slam on brakes which causes all 3 kids and dog to be jolted awake after only falling asleep a few minutes before. At this point we are literally at a stand still. No one is moving. No one is going any where and no one is happy. Finally, we start to move a little. Alas, it is not because traffic is moving forward but because people are turning around to go back to the previous exit.

So we did the only thing we could do and turned around through the median too. Thankfully we had better luck than this guy. And thankfully we had GPS and 3 devices that had Google maps otherwise there would have been 3 adults, 5 kids, and two dogs stuck in what appeared to be Deliverance!
After a two and a half hour trip turned into a 4 hour trip and completely sane people turned into hysterically crying, screaming people (kids not adults) we arrive at the beach house. The beach house which was supposed to have been vacated by the winter tenant that morning. The beach house which was supposed to have been cleaned by said tenant. The beach house which as we walked in with our 3 adults, 5 kids, and two dogs we realized was completely trashed because the lady had not only stayed the winter but had apparently moved everything she owned into the house including a 42 inch flat screen, every item of clothing she owned, a safe, plants, trunks, and even her own shower curtain! Most of her stuff was still there and the house was completely disgusting. There were literal dirt piles in the floor and stains on the carpet. It was sooooooo gross!

We quickly exited the premises and shoved extremely confused children and dogs back into the car where they had been trapped for the last 4 hours. We decide to get something to eat and figure out what to do. Do we get a hotel? Do we bunk with family members (that we don't know in another house)? Do we go back and take the woman out so that she sleeps with the fishes....the dead ones? 
Alas, there is no luck there either. The first 3 places we go to are closed, the next has been apparently invaded by frat boys, the next was closed, and finally, finally we find an open restaurant, "Killas Pizza". (That is the name. I promise I couldn't even make that up). My husband deemed it appropriate since we were all close to killin' someone! We unload all 3 adults and 5 kids and head in. Killas Pizza, aka Johnny McTighe's Irish Pub, is apparently dedicated to all of the cops that had been killed by killas or something because there were frames all around the place of old cop uniforms...even one with what appeared a bikers pony tail attached to it. However strange the decor was the pizza was without a doubt a killa because it sure nuff killed my taste buds with deliciousness! 
So we suck it up and decided to call the Water Color Inn and fork out a ridiculous amount of money for one night for a place with which to rest the 3 adults, 5 kids, and 2 dogs. Of course we never would have done this if my sister had not discovered my mother's credit card in her wallet. (Side Note to Judy: Why does she have your credit card? I would like a credit card. What am I chopped liver?) Any who....even the realization of unlimited funds does not change our luck because it is apparently Spring Break '13 Baby and Easter and there are no vacancies any where!

We decided to suck it up and go head back to the scene of the crime via the house next door with the distant relatives that we don't know. Luckily, they are out to eat when we roll up in there with our 3 adults, 5 kids, and 2 dogs. However, the crazy tenant is not. My husband takes it like a man and goes over to see what is going on. She says that she doesn't know when she will have everything out or get it cleaned and could he please help her move her large flat screen t.v. and safe. Needless to say, he declined and just walked away shaking his head. 
By this time, we are all set to stay with the relatives that we don't know when reality hits and we realize that even if she is out tomorrow the house won't be clean and we will have to spend all day cleaning it with 5 kids and 2 dogs running around and crying because we are not down at the beach. So we make a very hard but very smart decision....we load up the 3 adults, 5 kids, and 2 dogs back in the cars and we head home with promises of fun tomorrow including bubbles, water, Fun Station Jr., movies and more. 
We arrive back at around 1, unloaded the 3 adults, 5 kids, and 2 dogs along with all the paraphernalia that comes with it, climbed in the bed and try to forget the last 12 hours. 

The Adventure of a Lifetime it was NOT! Smartest decision ever, it was! The next day it was cold and rainy at the beach but hot and sunny in our backyard, where we had so much fun!

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