Welcome to the fabulous and sometimes insane life
of a working mother who is trying hard not to
let her whole existence be determined by her
cute little munchkins, yet continues to be drawn
in by the adorable and sometimes annoying tiny people!

Monday, May 23, 2011

To Brag or Not to Brag: That is the question!

I was recently conflicted as a parent. What had happened was...

My oldest child got several awards at her end of the year program. She scored perfect on her first grade "End of the Year" math test. She had the highest A.R. points in all of first grade, and she got a trophy for making "All A" Honor Roll for the entire year. She was so excited! She came back to her seat with her smile shining brightly and showing her medals and trophy to her friends. 

Without a doubt I was bursting with pride, yet I found myself holding back. I didn't want anyone to think...I am not really sure what I was afraid of. Was it jealousy? Or people thinking we were bragging? I don't know.

I even caught myself telling her, as she turned to show off her prizes to her friends, not to brag. I mean I, personally, know what it is like not to get something when a friend does and to be upset. But she wasn't showing them her awards to make them feel bad, she was just happy and wanted to share the good news with her friends.

Even as we sat in the auditorium, I watched as parents around me uploaded pictures of their children and their awards to Facebook. When I got home that day and over the next few days, I watched as everyone I knew posted how proud they were of their children and their end or the year accomplishments, yet I held back. 

I wonder if it comes from being so competitive with even my closest friends in high school, or if it is because I have naturally found myself feeling jealous before and didn't want someone else to feel that, or maybe it was because I have, guiltily, felt disappointed when my child didn't get something that I know she really wanted. But most likely it was because I didn't want someone to think that I was bragging or boasting and for them to say something snide. 

Why? I don't know. I mean I do not think bad of anyone for posting great things about their children. In fact, I am happy for them, as friends should be for each other.We should be shouting it to the mountain top when our children do awesome things, and we should be thrilled that our friends' children are accomplishing amazing things. We should be spreading the news like wild fire. 

I mean think about...if the situation was reversed and someone's kid had gotten in a wreck, or arrested, or heaven forbid pregnant, that news would spread like wild fire. So I say it shouldn't be a question of whether  to brag or not to brag about the great things our kids accomplish. We should shout it to the mountain tops. We should celebrate with each other! And yes, we should brag!!


Kathy said...

Congratulaitons to you and your daughter! How excting! It is strange, I think you were gracious in how you handled it and I'm sure so was she. I love to read good things that happen with other peoples children, but I do think it can get to be too much. This sounds like such a wonderful accomplishment, why wouldn't you guys want to shout it out!! Hope all is going well with you guys and that you are getting at least a touch of sleep!

Ali said...

I know, I felt the same way to begin with and then i let it flow... my reason was not that I was being boastful but i was so happy for my girls. This is the first year they have been awarded for their efforts; concerted efforts they put forth this year... the reason for their hard work? they didn't get awards last year and were so disappointed. It broke my heart to see them so sad and I told them the truth, you wanna be recognized? You make the effort! and they did... whoop whoop to all who walked the walk!!!! Share your kids awards...'cos you're their biggest cheerleader and always will be. xxxx