Talented

Okay! I am the first to admit that I am super clumsy. I mean it takes talent to trip over a flat surfaces and clearly I am swimming in talent, because not only can I trip over flat surfaces but I can also slip out of chairs and accidentally poke myself in the eye...with my own finger. (Seriously, I have done it before!) 

So if all of that takes talent then today I should have been receiving the Oscar award for Best Stunt Actress....except it wasn't a stunt. I wish I had had a stunt woman to replace me this morning and then she would be in pain and not me. 

What had happened was...
It was a cold, dark, and rainy morning. It had been raining for what seemed like years, yet in all actuality was only a couple of days. We were running late...of course, we were running late. What else would we be doing on a Monday morning?

Anyway, as we headed up the perilous steps intothe building. Perilous because there are many of them that are not really all that steep at all but do have varying heights which could confused some of the less coordinated individuals, such as myself, who might venture up them. Point is....they were perilous!

My oldest munchkin asked me a question and I turned to answer her. This was mistake #2. Turning head while walking never results in something good. I have known myself for 34 years now and I should know never to take my eyes off of steps when I am walking. What was mistake #1, you might ask. Walking up the stairs on a cold, dark, and rainy morning.

No sooner had I whipped my head around when I missed a step. Actually, I didn't miss it. I step on it. Well, I step on the edge and my foot slipped and I fell forward. Now this would not have been nearly as bad, had I been able to brace myself. Alas, both of my hands were full. One with a steaming hot, zebra print cup of coffee. Therefore, there was nothing to break my fall as I slammed down onto the extremely hard concrete.

Needless to say, it #&@*ing hurt!!! And I could not help the few profanities that then slipped out of my mouth. I was just thinking how thankful I was that my children were the only ones around when I looked up to see a father coming out of the building. Luckily, I think he was too distracted by the laughing coming from the group of children coming up the stairs behind me to hear.

Once I got inside I ran into my principal, who, when she saw my soaking wet clothes and my limping, informed me that I needed to fill out an accident report. So I followed her to her office where she began to write up the report. When I told her I tripped up the stairs, she started laughing. Seriously?!?!? That made it sooooooo much better!

By the end of the day, the story had made it through half of the school. I could always tell who had heard it by looking at the smile on their face as they passed me in the hallway. Hey, what can I say? I told you I was talented! Talented....with a few scrapes and bruises added in!